In the people business, it is frustration with others which is the most common problem we encounter. When I encounter a bad situation with another person I often ask two questions. “Did someone intend to send this harm to me?” or “Did he send harm unknowingly? 

Whichever the case it may be, the response should be that you have a gained a new charge to take care of. Think of it as a future friend. In addition, that person cannot know at all of your ”good intentions” or all your actions will fall back into the catagory of retaliation. You both must learn from the incident.

 It will not one-sided effort, you are already the charge of the other. That person has put forth a challenge to you to learn to work with others.

You should expect no feedback about your leadership from others except the success at the end. Should the success come at the end it will feel like total accident. If you do not succeed you are left with the regret of wasting your time you could have better spent remaining indifferent and keping your pride intact. If you should get feedback while you are leading others it will undoubtedly be negative. These are the reasons why few people do it and why it is the most valued interaction we have.

Sometimes it is just the basics that we get hung up on, but we get so far in life that its embarassing to admit it. 

Teaching problem solving skills to others can often be a problem to solve for which you have not developed the skill yet.

Some tips of the years that we have uncovered :

1. Believe in a solution. You cannot find something if you do not believe it exists. (If you struggle in beliving a solution exists, you need to work on your attitude before to working on the problem)

2. Prior to approaching an issue, expect more problems in solving the issue and plan to go around them. Therefore when problems crop up frustration is less likely to set in. When you are frustrated you can’t think.

3. Research how similar problems have been solved in the past on line or in person.

4. Work in parallel rather than sequentially. When you are doing trial and error, inquiries, testing theories. Run several different approaches at the same time, dont wait until one avenue’s results come in before starting the next.

5.  Have urgency and a deadline. More time on a problem can often produce poor or no results. Urgency allows you brain to heat up and work better.